Below Deck Mediterranean Season 9 Episode 1 Recap

Welcome to Under deck Med season nine! For those of us who have watched the iconic series, there are no off weeks between seasons, just like the breakneck pace of turning a boat around for back-to-back charters. Before the premiere begins, the preview for the next season teases a rope break, make-outs, almost make-outs, and too many blondes so I can’t tell who anyone is. I can’t wait to see all these moments in context and realize that most of them are trailer fodder and not big deals at all.

Now let’s go through this season’s crew, led once again by Captain Sandy. Sandy preaches that they have her full trust and respect until proven otherwise – who will be the first to lose her? My money is on Nathan or Bri.

Aesha, Chief Stew: Aesha was the second stew in seasons four and five, then the main stew in both seasons of Below deck, below. She and Sandy are so excited to be working together again. They remained friends over the years; Aesha and her boyfriend, Scott, even visited Sandy in Denver. Sandy likes that Aesha goes the extra mile to please her guests. The potential for problematic favoritism is high, folks.

Iain, Bosun: South African Iain has been working on yachts for five years. His father is a professional canoeist (thanks, Iain, for teaching me a new word), and he started working as a river guide for his father’s company at 16. Iain’s mother is called Sandy, a fact we’ll have to unpack sometime. we know him better.

Elena, aka Ellie, the second stew: Ellie only completed the last charter of season seven and it inspired her to continue working on yachts. She’s taken cocktail classes and prefers service to housekeeping, so Aesha puts her up for the night.

Jono, cook: Jono describes himself as a “culinary architect,” partly because he was a literal architect before he became a chef. He once replaced a yacht chef friend and turned it into a career. Learning that he is self-taught fuels my delusion that I could be a yacht chef.

Joe, the deckhand: Joe is from Liverpool and lives in Spain. The crew met a few hours ago and already she says she likes fingering her ass hole before bed.

Nathan, deckhand: Nathan is from a small Irish village of only 600 people. He tells us that he likes to cause trouble and do things he shouldn’t. I’m sure he told the casting agents the exact same thing.

Gael, Deckhand: An Aussie, Gael started out as a stew but loves being outside and was drawn to the deck department. Her fellow shifters are disappointed to learn that Gael has a second engineer boyfriend of five months. She says she’s a relationship girl because she doesn’t like starting over with someone new, which doesn’t convince me that she likes her boyfriend that much.

Bri, the third stew: Bri has been yachting for two years on boats smaller than that Mustique. She admits she has room to grow, but she also tells us she wants to stay a kid forever. “The thought of taxes scares the living hell out of me.” Is this woman admitting on national television that she doesn’t pay her taxes?

The Mustique he quickly picks up his musty sounding name as one of the crew cabin ceilings is leaking. Sandy hopes to have a fourth stew, but they don’t have room for one when they’re at the cabin. For cabin duties, Aesha wisely has Gael so she is not in the room with her direct reports.

The team get to work preparing the boat, but the supplies don’t arrive until after 8pm Greek ferries are notoriously late, so this doesn’t seem too surprising. Worse, the delivery is only a quarter of what Aesha needs and lacks basic alcohol. They only have a bottle of champagne. The rest are scheduled to arrive at 11:45 the next morning, even though the charter starts at noon. Sandy remains optimistic about the delay: “Pressure makes us better.” She also lays down the rules in an all-team meeting: no drinking on the charter and to respect each other professionally, sexually and culturally. Speaking of sex, Nathan is already flirting with Gael while unloading supplies, while Bri has her eye on Joe and loves his bushy eyebrows.

The next morning, Elena is inexplicably wearing her Playboy bunny ears. I don’t know if this is to remind us of her previous appearance on the show when she wore them, to get the boys’ attention, or if she just really loves the costumes. She says she travels with a bunch of costumes, 10% of which are PG-13. It’s unclear if that means the other 90 percent is tamer or R-rated, but I’m sure we’ll find out as the season goes on.

The first guests are Gen-Z influencer Jacob Ward and his friends from London. Its content seems to be focused on fitness and cycling. Aesha wonders what she’s doing living in a van with her boyfriend when these kids can afford a superyacht charter. Aesha is self-deprecating: she and Sandy both have more Instagram followers than Jacob (837,000 and 763,000 to his 306,000). He has just under 400,000 on TikTok, which is probably where the best monetization is, and Aesha is ready to help with photos and videos.

As Aesha gives the guests a tour, she informs them that they are out of champagne or rosé, but she is coming as soon as possible and they can make cocktails in the meantime. The guests ask if anyone can go to the store for rosé before they leave, but that doesn’t happen. They order spicy margaritas, which will have to be without cilantro because it hasn’t even arrived yet. I’m pretty sure cilantro isn’t a necessary ingredient and Aesha didn’t need to tell the already disappointed guests they were out of another item.

The emergency champagne delivery finally arrives, but still no rosé or red wine, and the rest of the food doesn’t arrive until 7pm. Aesha has never had a problem like this before and Sandy doesn’t understand either, but she’s ready. to help the crew when needed. They set out from Athens, heading for Aegina. Leaving the jetty and first dropping the anchor goes smoothly. Iain is satisfied that all members of his team are competent.

The same cannot be said for the crew inside. Bri is tasked with steaming the guests’ clothes and is a the fight. As he figures out how to use the steamer, there are lots of beeps that make me think an alarm is going off in my house, but thankfully it’s just incompetence 6,000 miles away. He can’t hurt me. Bri shares that she grew up with a housekeeper and housekeeper, so this is newer to her. She spends the entire afternoon—six and a half hours—steaming, but when the guests go to change for dinner, they don’t have their clothes back. One of the guests even goes down to the laundry room to find his clothes. Aesha takes Bri’s place, who “explains” that she likes to take her time to make sure she’s okay. This excuse doesn’t add up. Then Bri drops a bombshell in an interview: In her two years of yachting experience, she has never made it past a full season! At some point, you have to stop and ask if a job is right for you, but Bri didn’t do that. Later, when he goes to deliver the clothes, he mixes up which clothes belong to which guests. A Below deck the yacht might be the only one that would hire her.

Publishers set deadlines so exact it’s as if they’re preparing materials to stand up in court. Twenty-nine minutes after the supplies were supposed to arrive, the delivery man tells Aesha that they were delivered to the wrong water taxi and won’t be there until 9:00 p.m., when dinner is scheduled. Guests have been asking for surf and turf, so Jono changes the menu from lobster to crab. He is impressively steadfast.

For dinner, Ellie quickly changes into a disco ball top and metallic leggings to dress up the theme. Aesha and Bri hadn’t even changed into black, a sign that it had been a rough day. There is no wine left, but eventually more arrives during dinner. Somehow, there is still no red. Despite the lack of wine pairings, guests are satisfied with the food. During dinner, Ellie pulls double duty between classes to help Bri turn down the cabins. Bri asks if a bathroom she cleaned looks okay, and Ellie kindly points out that the floors are still wet. She says don’t sweat the first day – she’s going to train Bri. Similarly, Aesha doesn’t want to stress Bri more and just focus on getting to the first charter. Aesha leaves at 11:40pm so she can get up early to help Bri. She learned that she has to trust her stews because she can’t do everything and she puts her trust in Ellie.

Unfortunately for Ellie, the guests are nowhere near bedtime. They party with a confetti cannon that may look great for content, but looks awful to clean up. At 12:20 in the morning, they ask for a mojito and late-night foods—grilled cheese, mac and cheese, nachos, guac, etc. Ellie hasn’t had to make food for drunk people anymore and is feeling overwhelmed, so she wakes Jono up. Jono, half asleep: “Mm-mm. I don’t think so.” Ellie says she’s going to make grilled cheese and tell the guests it’s all they can do. Meanwhile, Gael turns on the hot tub, which looks like it should have been ready by now. Now the mojito has 45 minutes late and ask for more cocktails. Gael radios her to Ellie, who comes in to explain that she’s the only one with drinks and food. Based on the time stamps we’re given, somehow this conversation takes 15 minutes?! Grilled cheese could be made in that time and we didn’t even saw the cheese hit the bread yet. Ellie makes the mojitos while Gael helps with the grilled cheese a full hour after they were ordered. Ellie then tries to wake Jono up again at 1:30am. She thinks his selfish behavior makes her look stupid, like she can’t handle guests. As far as we can see, she can’t handle them! She tells Jono that this will be a big problem. He still refuses, saying he didn’t get enough sleep. Ellie just wastes more time without convincing him. He’s right that this is a problem, but based on the previews for next week, he’s wrong about which one will be in trouble.